


The kiss of a soulmate

by Noire12



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Lavellan/Solas - Freeform, Romance, Sexual Tension, Solavellan, pinning, solas/lavellan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:13:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26714275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noire12/pseuds/Noire12
Summary: A retelling of the famous Fade kiss. (or how I like to call it "Fade tongue)
Relationships: Female Lavellan/Solas, Solas/Female Lavellan, solavellan - Relationship
Comments: 5
Kudos: 18





	The kiss of a soulmate

**Author's Note:**

> Pfiu! This is my first really long fic. I had a blast writing it. What an interesting experience. Also, special thanks to ellie-effie for being my beta and improving my work. Thank you so so much for your help!

The stars shone brightly above Skyhold; the battlements were quiet, no soldiers in sight. The only noise that broke the silence of the night was a muffled sob.

Elluin Lavellan shivered in the night's cold, the chilly air pinching at the swollen eyes. Gut-wrenching sobs tore through her chest, making it hard to breathe. The grief came in waves and threatened to consume her entirely. Even after an hour of crying, it still hurt.

A few weeks after the fall of Haven and four days since they arrived at Skyhold. While Elluin was fascinated by every nook and corner of the ancient castle and spent the day learning more about it, a terrible sadness crushed her spirit. The ordeal of crossing the snowy mountains and the lack of sleep due to nightmares about wild animals hunting her broke the will to carry on. Her body and soul suffered. 

At every step, the wound on the left leg burned, sending excruciating jabs. It was difficult to walk and be a leader when every bone in her body howled in agony. The cold didn't help at all, and even if Solas sought to alleviate the discomfort with his soothing hands and gentle words, the pain and misery made her break down in tears every night.

But what hurt the most, the true reason she wept every night until she fell asleep exhausted was not the pain but the recollections of those slain by Corypheus. Their deaths hung heavily on her conscience, erasing any confidence in a better future. She sought to be strong for her people, but that belief was shattered a few days ago when they held a ceremony for the ones who fell fighting for Haven.

Elluin held the tears inside, pretending to be an unwavering leader, one who can withstand any death in the battle for justice. A strong arm everyone can hold on when times get harder. 

The Inquisition made promises to avenge every man, woman, and child fallen at the hand of the corrupted god. She pledged she would never forget their names and justice will be delivered. All-day long, people hugged the Inquisitor, bringing their thanks for the empowering messages. 

But that was just a facade, a mask she had to wear.

So many tears spilt in anger and sorrow. The sadness floated in the air, and the desire to hide away from it all made her tremble. The instincts told her to leave, but running was not an option.

It hurt. She was their leader with the mission to protect them, but it was all in vain. She failed, and people died. They offered her kindness and acceptance, and now they were gone.

All because of her ineptness. 

Why did they make her the Inquisitor? She was no leader—only a travelling elf, who enjoyed a good book and a strong beer. 

They were wrong. They should have picked Cassandra. Or anyone else. Cassandra would have stopped Corypheus, and everyone would still be alive.

Those thoughts gnawed away at the little confidence she had, and no one could help.

Even after a few days, the memories of all those sad people made her cry. Once again, her pain led her to the battlements, where she sobbed for hours, the loneliness numbing the thoughts.

But today the torment was interrupted by the sound of steps. Ellun knew precisely who was coming, even without looking. She memorized those soft steps and could recognize them with ease. 

She didn't bother to wipe down the tears: Solas has seen her cry many times before, he was the only one she allowed to see her like this.

Solas stopped, surprised to see the Inquisitor on the battlements. It was late, and even if he knew Elluin had a strange sleeping pattern, she usually was asleep at this hour.

"Hello Solas," she greeted with a raspy, bitter tone.

Solas frowned. She usually greeted him grinning, ready to ask questions, or share ideas. From time to time, sadness engulfed the Inquisitor, and it shattered his heart to see such a bright, colourful soul drowning in sorrow.

"Are you not well, Inquisitor? What are you doing up so late?"

Elluin chuckled. 

"I should ask you the same. Why are you up? Don't you miss the Fade?"

Solas offered a soft smile. 

"Even I can have a hard time falling asleep, Inquisitor."

It wasn't the whole truth. Indeed, he had problems with sleep, but it was because of the woman standing in front of him.

She had haunted his dreams once more. That night, they had been together in a manner he deeply desired, but he knew it would never be true. He had to make sure of this.

He woke up from the dream sweating intensely, a part of him overstimulated. A walk in the cold air helped. And his steps lead him to the battlements, without even noticing. 

But here she was, crying again. His heart beckoned to hold her until the pain dissolved. To whisper sweet nothings.

He could not. Not now, not ever. 

The woman he loved mourned, and he could not offer any solace. This thought made his stomach clench painfully. 

"Haven?" he finally dared to ask.

Elluin nodded and whipped the tears, a soft sob leaving her lips.

"I am sorry, Inquisitor."

That was all he could offer—a foolish old man.

"It's all right, Solas, you have no fault in this. I made a mistake, and I will find a way to deal with it alone."

Alone. 

This word struck deeply.

Solas clutched his fingers. It was his fault she was hurting. His mistake brought all the pain, and at this moment, he hated himself even more. 

"We all make mistakes, Inquisitor. Allow yourself this one."

"Is that so? Did any of your mistakes cause the death of 63 people, Solas?"

Elluin knew this bitterness was uncalled for. He was only trying to help, and the words hold wisdom.

Solas remained silent at this remark.

_ No, Inquisitor. My mistake destroyed an entire civilization,  _ he thought, but she could never find out the truth. 

An awkward silence enveloped them. Elluin felt guilty for the outburst. He was a gentle, kind man, always there to support her. He did not deserve this treatment, no matter how much anger she felt. 

She sighed loudly, trying to break the heavy atmosphere. 

"I wish my last memory with Haven was different. I don't want to remember it as I've seen it the last time. All that destruction. It didn't look like the Haven I knew and loved. 

"I may be able to help you with that, Inquisitor," Solas said fast.

  
  


"Really?" Elluin replied, amazed. "How?"

Ah, this sounded much more like her. 

"In the Fade. I can show you Haven, as it was before its destruction. "

What was he doing? This was a perilous path. He cussed at his hastiness to make her happy again. His feelings for her dangerously weakened his state of mind. Bringing Elluin in the Fade was a precarious move. 

She looked surprised; green eyes widened in bafflement. Solas rarely offered to walk the Fade together. And when he agreed, it was because Elluin insisted on learning more about a place. 

The Fade was his retreat from the harshness of the word, and she understood why he desired to be alone there, away from anyone. 

His offer was sudden and wonderful, and it unleashed a train of thought that made her blush. 

_ "Stop it!"  _ she thought, admonishing herself _. "This isn't the time nor the place for it." _

Elluin cleared her throat, looking everywhere but at him.

"Are you certain about that? I don't wish to impose you."

"Of course, Inquisitor. A commander as yourself requires a sharp mind to steer the people wisely. Seeing Haven again will help."

Ah, of course. That's why he cared. She was a leader, his superior. He was doing this for the safety of the word, not for her specifically—foolish woman. 

"Thank you, Solas. I will gladly do it."

"Very well. I shall see you in the Fade."

He suddenly turned around to leave without saying good night. As if he was eager to get away from her.

Elluin watched him go, heart, pounding fast against the ribs. Solas had this strange effect on her. Every time she talked with him, the repressed emotions came back in waves, making everything harder and confusing. 

She was ashamed. The feelings for Solas shadowed the pain for the ones lost in battle. She should be mourning instead of getting excited about spending more time with the man she loved. 

She sighed once more—what a pathetic leader.

But her heart wasn't the only one pounding. Indeed, he was in a hurry to leave but not to get away from her. On the contrary, he was impatient and eager to show her everything the Fade could offer. To share what was dear to him.

Solas cursed himself for the excitement bubbling in his heart.

.............................................................................................................................................

Elluin stared at the ceiling, unable to fall asleep. It was difficult to relax with all the thoughts floating around her mind. And of course, the majority of them were about Solas and the feelings for him.

It had been a few months since she finally realized what those feelings meant. When Leliana suggested that she might be in love, laughter was her first reaction. In love?Her? Impossible!

Elluin heard about love and what it meant but had a suspicion it was more a tool for the writers than a regularly occurring situation. She had been with men and women, but being in love? Never. And now Leliana smirked and winked every time he was around. Infuriating!

Elluin turned on the right side of the bed and vigorously punched a pillow in the process. As if the pillow had any fault for her childish behaviour.

And even if she was in love, it didn't matter. She was sure Solas didn't share the same feelings.

Yes, maybe they did flirt. And yes, they spent a lot of time together, but that meant nothing. And sure, they would sleep in the same tent from time to time, but it was just sleeping. Nothing special in that!

It was all right. His presence was enough to enchant her heart. Having him around as a friend was perfect. Leliana could wink as much as she wanted.

And with this last thought, her mind calmed. Finally, the Fade was calling for her.

.................................................................................................................................................................

  
  


Here she was again, in the Fade—an enigmatic place, with twisted spires always floating on the horizon. As soon as she stepped, the path shifted and morphed, ready to mirror the thoughts and desires.

  
  


The green light flickered on her face, caressing the skin. The magic flew with no restraint, and she felt free here. The only drawback to this was the demons. Especially the rage demons. They liked Elluin, but after so many years she learned how to evade them.

A trying plane who could obliterate any mage with lesser skills. But she always loved a challenge.

Elluin closed her eyes, focusing on keeping the current landscapes. It was risky to let her desire dance around while waiting for Solas. One small slip in the Fade and all the truth will be unleashed.

She found it laborious to control emotions here. They were baffled and puzzling, even when awake. But the Fade amplified them, diminishing any resolve she had. It made it harder to be around Solas. The thought of a Desire demon or a Passion spirit with the form of Solas frightened her. That would be troublesome to explain.

  
  


She inhaled and exhaled a few times, a brief meditation before their trip. If only her heart could stop being so frustratingly stubborn.

A delicate shift in the air interrupted her exercise. Solas already traced her magic. It was incredible how quick he did it—the perks of being a somniari.

He calmly walked towards her, tall and proud, looking more relaxed than ever. A smile lit up his features. He looked much younger, and Elluin was fascinated by the change. Next to him, a trembling form floated serenely. Wisdom.

"Ah, you are finally here, Inquisitor." Solas greeted her.

"Sorry for being late. I've had problems falling asleep.

"No need to worry. My friend kept me company.

"I hope I am worth the wait, Solas", she asked, a cheekiness in her words.

Her mouth spoke without her consent.

_ "Shit. Stop it!" _

Solas chucked, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

"Of course you are, Lavellan."

He always called her Lavellan here. Not Inquisitor or Herald. Not the name she wanted to hear from him, but still a victory.

Wisdom waved at Elluin, a welcoming aura radiating from it.

"A pleasure to see you again, Curiosity." Wisdom spoke, slightly bowing at Elluin.

The first time Elluin met Wisdom, she assaulted the poor spirit with a myriad of questions. Wisdom fondly called her Curiosity since that day.

"The same, Wisdom. Thank you for keeping Solas company."

"How have you been, my friend?" Wisdom asked Elluin, a warm aura emanating from it. "I have heard doubts are tormenting you?"

Elluin frowned slightly at Solas, for she did not know they were talking about her in private. 

"A few, yes. Nothing to upset yourself with, my friend." Her reply was relaxed and lighthearted, to make Wisdom move on from the subject, but the spirit saw through the facade. 

"I know it is tough, Curiosity, but you are above fear and uncertainty. You have always found a path to survive any difficulty, for your mind is the ideal tool against any obstacle. Do not let fear darken your thoughts and suppress your qualities. For fear is the mind-killer, and whoever lets it lead them is lost forever. Your spirit is stronger and purer than your enemy's. Your cause is right, and that will aid you. Never doubt who you are, my friend, and never forget the wisdom that led you on the right paths in life. I have put my trust in you." 

Gratitude overtook Elluin at these words. A spirit of wisdom trusted her to save the world. How could she dare to give up and disappoint it? All she could do was nod, too moved by emotions to say anything else.

Wisdom smiled at Elluin's reaction and hugged her in a loving thought. How fragile people were sometimes.

"Solas told me you two have plans, so I will take my leave. Remember, my friend; you can always come to me for advice or exchange a few words. I truly appreciate your insight."

Wisdom bowed again and dissipated in the air, the friendly aura hugging both of them.

They both stayed there, basking in the kindness a spirit willingly offered.

"Are you ready to see Haven once more"? Solas spoke, the touch of Wisdom softening him.

  
  


Elluin nodded, and waited for the little tug in the air, as Solas bent the Fade to his will.

The well-known path cleared before her eyes. The small houses covered in thick snow greeted them. And standing tall once more, the Temple of Sacred Ashes. Her home.

Happiness washed over her, and sorrow lost a part of its force. Solas was right. This was necessary.

"Astounding. Every time you do this, I am speechless. Your skills are extraordinary. You are an impressive man, Solas."

She could see the tips of his ears slowly reddening, and a cackle escaped her lips.

"I never imagine you being the shy one to compliments."

She knew she shouldn't be so forward. But it was so natural to admire him.

He smirked to hide his embarrassment.

"Ah, but you see Lavellan, it is not about the compliment but more about the person who offers it."

It was Elluin's turn to blush. It always surprised her when he did this. Sneakingly flirting and complimenting her.

Solas bit his tongue. This was a dangerous game to play. One he couldn't win. Not here, not this time.

He turned his back at her, to escape the playfulness in her eyes.

"Let us go. Haven is here for you to explore."

Elluin was delighted. She could see once again the place that brought her peace and joy. At first, she despised it. It felt like a prison. But slowly, it became a place where friends waited for her. It became home.

The sight of the familiar spots warmed her heart, and she felt whole again. Even the cold didn't bother her that much.

The smithy where she crafted her staff with the help of Harritt. The tavern where she laughed and drunk side by side with Bull and the other patrons. The training grounds where she trained alongside the soldiers, Cassandra yelling at her to run faster. The bench around the fire where she drew. Sometimes bothered by a curious Varric or by a lively group of children asking her to play with them.

  
  


Even if she knew everything was a memory, it still gave her the strength to smile again. Haven is lost, but the fight isn't over yet. She isn't' the finest leader they had, but she couldn't give up. All those people deserved to be alive. Skyhold won't fall as Haven did. Not while she was around. 

  
  


Solas watched Elluin all this time, two steps behind her. He could catch the emotions that gripped her and the slight shift from sadness to determination. Slowly, the desperation was replaced by courage. The stubborn glint returned to her eyes. She was once again the woman he knew—the relentless, fierce mage, ready to oppose anyone who threatened the world.

A smile blossomed on his lips. She was wonderful like this, standing tall and confident once more, ready to face any enemy. The light of the setting sun highlighted her features, and she looked mesmerizing. Her grace absorbed him, and right now all he craved was to taste that beauty.

What if he embraced her right now? Would she resent it? Would she drive him away? No. He wasn't blind. He could see her lingering glances and the yearning in them. But was he ready to face the repercussions?

Elluin spoke, but he could barely hear a sound. He blinked fast to push away those troublesome, inappropriate thoughts.

"Apologies, I was lost in thought. What were you saying?"

"I was talking about the Breach, Solas. It looks so real, even in here. I can almost feel its pull on the Mark." she said once again, pointing up, towards it. "It must have been terrifying to see it in the sky."

  
  


"It was indeed," he answered, joining her to look at the Breach. "That is the reason why I came. My help was necessary."

  
  


Elluin shook her head at his remarks.

  
  


"I can't believe you strolled in the middle of a building packed with Seekers. They could have captured you and made you a Tranquil. It was brave of you.

  
  


"You flatter me. You would have done the same."

  
  


"No. I would have run as far away as possible. Somewhere hot and nice. Maybe Rivain. I've always loved it."

  
  


Solas chuckled, smiling fondly at her.

  
  


"You care too much about this world, Lethallan. I doubt you would sit around and watch it burn. You are the kindest person I ever met. It would not be in your nature. "

  
  


Elluin was rendered speechless by the gentleness in his words. Why was he doing this right now? 

  
  


She laughed awkwardly, running a hand through the curls of her hair. The little restraint she had slipped away gradually. This was bad.

  
  


"But it was frustrating," he continued, as if not noticing the reaction. "You were never going to wake up! How could you? A mortal sent physical through the Fade! I was frightened and ready to flee."

  
  


"But you didn't," she said.

  
  


"No. I told myself, one more attempt to seal the rifts. It still did not work. I resigned myself to run, but you arrived. You sealed it with a gesture and then...I felt the whole world change. "

  
  


Elluin stared at him. The tone of his voice broke through any barrier crafted against him. To the Void with all the precautions and restraints. She had enough.

  
  


"You felt the whole world change?" she asked, hardly keeping in the burning fire of passion.

  
  


"A figure of speech," he said, moving away from her a few steps.

  
  


He could feel his heart thumping faster. This was dangerous. He was able to resist any temptation. He won't falter right now.

  
  


"I'm aware, Solas. I'm more interested in what you felt."

  
  


But he didn't give a response. He smiled humbly and turned to face the Breach again.

  
  


_ Oh no, you won't get away this time, sweet talker. _

  
  


That did it. She lunged and grabbed him by the collar, smacking her lips against his. A bit too forcefully, but Elluin couldn't care less. She had been hiding those desires for far too long.

Solas' eyes widen in bewilderment. He knew Elluin was bold, but not like this. He could see her expression. Eyebrows knitted in concentration, a blush spread across her cheeks, highlighting the freckles. He stood there, too surprised to move.

It took her a few seconds to realize Solas wasn't reacting in any manner. His lips were still and passive. 

Elluin panicked, convinced she misinterpreted the hints. She pushed him back, ready to run away from Solas and this awkward moment. 

She took only a few steps when two hands grabbed her by the waist. Solas tugged her back and smirked, eyes shining with desire and playfulness. 

He yanked her, knocking all the wind from her lungs. She moaned at the sudden contact between their bodies. His hands drifted to her hips, while her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him down.

Finally, it was happening. 

Solas lips mashed with hers in a display of passion she never knew he possessed. He was eager to kiss her back, and this time his lips were moving.

His plump lips felt cold against hers. They were soft and sweet, the lips of a soulmate. 

He kissed her as no one ever did. With an unstoppable passion, lust fogging their minds and erasing any doubts about this moment 

Solas pulled her closer and closer as if every centimetre between them bothered him personally. She was trapped between his hands and chest; the small breasts squeezed against him.

She was real, and he needed her more than anything. Sweeter than any woman.

Her smell was intoxicating. The scent of lily of the valley, mixed with the smokiness of her magic unleashed his lust. 

With one hand clenched in her red hair and one her back, Solas devoured her and Elluin could barely keep up with it.

Solas was kissing her. The man she loved was kissing her back. He wanted her too, and it wasn't just a trick of the imagination. All those lingering looks, all those flirtings were true. Solas saw her more than just a friend, and that thought drove away any doubt. 

Elluin hungry kissed back with newly found vigour, as she gripped his neck firmly. She wasn't going to let him have all the fun. They devoured each other, tasting and taking in the flavours of their lips. 

They moaned and whispered each other's name, tugging on their clothes, touching and exploring every part of their bodies. No place escaped their desperate search.

Their passion attracted curious spirits, but they couldn't care less.

Solas tiled Elluin slowly, one leg between hers. He almost came undone at the heat pooling there. As long as she was in his arms, he made sure to please her.

Elluin grabbed desperately on his clothes, as he tilted her, never wanting to let go, not even for a second. 

She needed Solas with every fibre in her body, and he could feel it. He felt empowered by this and became bolder in his action. He raised his knee to rub her clit and Elluin moaned loudly. If he continued like this, she wouldn't be able to stop herself.

  
  
  


She needed to breathe and soon. Slowly, she broke the kiss as Solas bit her lower lip, not ready to let go yet. 

They looked at each other for a few seconds, never breaking their embrace. Solas shook his head and dipped in again a long, hot-blooded kiss. 

His hand slowly made its way to her butt and squeezed it. It was a strong grab, one that might leave a few bruises but Elluin only laughed in delight against his lips. 

He smirked too, and Elluin took this chance to slip her tongue in his mouth. 

The tongue explored his mouth, and he allowed it, enjoying every second of it. Their tongues twisted and twirled, a few drops of saliva falling alongside their lips. 

This was not a romantic kiss. It was a ravenous, desperate one. Born by the frustration of hiding out the truth. The truth about their love, about their painful desires. Of soulmates finding each other across space and time. It only required a spark, an excuse.

Solas slowly rubbed against her, looking for a release, one hand slowly pulling her hair.

"Solas, please", she begged him to continue, the head of the moment making it hard to articulate. 

But hearing his name was a wake-up call. He let his guard down and made a grave mistake. 

He gently pushed Elluin away from him, shaking the head in denial.

This isn't right. Not even here!" 

"Solas, wait, what do you mean?" Elluin asked, still dazed by the kiss. 

"We need to stop. I need to stop. I shouldn't have let this happen." 

Panic struck Elluin. What was going on? Why this sudden change?

"What do you mean? I don't understand. Do you dislike it?" she asked, voice shaking. 

"No, no. It is not that. We cannot talk about it here. Not now. We should talk about this when we are awake." 

Before Elluin could answer, the Fade twisted, pushing her back to the waking world. 

.....................................................................................................................................................................

  
  


Her eyes snapped open, the room solidifying. Solas' kiss still lingered on the lips, and it beckoned her to seek an explanation. 

Bare feet pattered on the cold floor, and the steps resounded in the empty castle. It was too early for people to witness the Inquisitor running barefoot, in a robe with the shoulders showing. The messy hair with tangled curls framing a determined expression.

Once again, Solas shirked the responsibility of their feelings, but Elluin wouldn't let him go away this time. Not after the kiss. 

She made her way to his private chamber, for it was too early for him to be in the rotunda. And she'd rather prefer to discuss this in the privacy of his room, without the curious ears of the others. 

The door of his room was open, and Elluin sheepishly entered , the courage dissolving. What if he rejects her?

Solas sat up, hands behind his back, and an indecipherable expression. He waited for Elluin to storm the room and know very well the Inquisitor won't leave without fulfilling answers.

"Inquisitor", he greeted, encouraging Elluin to come closer. 

Aware of her looks, a blush bloomed on the cheeks. What a wonderful way to ask for a love confession. And he was wearing no shirt! Was he doing this on purpose? Or he had no time to prepare? This wasn't the first time seeing him bare-chested. Sharing a tent and travelling a lot together meant seeing the little, hidden parts. 

This moment was exasperating. She has seen men and women naked, some more handsome than he was, but a bare chest flustered her. Maybe because a few moments ago she clung to it like there was no tomorrow.

The thought of touching that warm chest sent a heatwave in the body. Infuriating man!

But Solas was delighted by the whole scene. It was uncommon to see the Inquisitor so unkempt and hesitant, all flushed up. Even if the kiss was imprudent, he felt the pride in witnessing its effect. Still being a charming courtier, even after all that time. 

"Sleep well?" 

The cheeky tone gave the reassurance Elluin looked for. Wasn't he going to turn her down after all?

"No, not really," she answered back smugly. "I was too busy kissing you, or did you already forget?" 

"I could never forget it, Inquisitor," he said, ready to push her away. "But it was a reckless kiss, and I should not have encouraged it."

"What? Reckless? You kissed me back! It didn't feel reckless to me when you grabbed my butt! Solas, if you aren't interested, then I'll leave."

Anger surged, for she was worn out because of this "cat and mouse" game. Never in her life has she chased a lover. If he wasn't interested, then she barked at the wrong tree. Slowly, Elluin turned around to leave, but Solas' voice stopped her. 

"No! No, it is not that. I….it has been a while since I have done that. I have been on my own for such a long time; I might not be the best choice for you, Inquisitor. And there are considerations…..

Elluin frowned. This was odd. Solas never spoke so low about himself, always so prideful and ready to prove a point to anyone who doubted him.

Oh, so that's what it was? Lack of confidence in himself? What a silly man. She drew closer and grabbed his hand, squeezing it.

"Solas, I could never meet someone better than you. In 36 years, I have never seen someone like you. I admire you quite a lot. You are infuriating, charming, and exciting. And I am not perfect. I am filled with rage, pain, and insecurities. You saw me at my worst and still liked me. No matter what you will do, I could not dislike you because you have stolen my heart. I am ready to give us a try if you want."

She slapped herself mentally. This was cheesy, and Varric would be proud. The words sounded childish and simple, but how was it possible to explain what she felt? How happy was she? Love was a mystery, one she was ready to uncover with him. 

Solas' instincts screamed to push and reject her. To lie and say the kiss meant nothing. That she was better off with Cullen or Josephine, but he was tired. Tired of always being lonely. Of sleeping in a cold bed. Tired to hide the feelings and resist her intoxicating pull. For once, he decided to be selfish and gave in.

"I need some time to think, Elluin. But you have captivated me.

He almost giggled at the confused expression written on her face. It was the first time when he used that name.

"Take all the time you need, Solas. I will wait for you, no matter how long.."

Even if impatience nagged to hug him, she understood. And the new events complicated the situation. It wasn't wise to fall in love during times of war, and all her efforts and thoughts should be channelled on Corypheus and how to defeat him, instead of falling in love. But she was a fool, always failing at doing the right things.

  
  


"Thank you," Solas said, overwhelmed by the acceptance. It was such a strange feeling. Being accepted by someone with no "buts and ifs".

They remained still, looking at each other lovingly, at a loss of words. The weight of their decisions hung heavy on their shoulders. To Elluin, it meant bonding with a man in a manner she had never done before. For Solas, it was a huge complication in the plan, one he might regret later.

The noise of people walking and talking in the hallway woke them from their bliss. It was time to get into their daily roles and forget their feelings. Elluin sighed deeply, for she had to wear the leader's mask once again and love had no place in there. 

"I should go before others see us together and become too curious. I don't want the whole castle to know about our discussion."

"Indeed. Goodbye, Inquisitor." 

Elluin shuddered at that name. She couldn't wait to hear the real name again, no matter how much time it took. 

Back in the halls of the castle, she greeted the passing soldiers as they stared in amazement at her attire. They were already making up rumours about with whom she had shared a bed tonight.

Elluin hurried the pace, in a frenzy to get to Leliana before the rumours got to the Spymaster. Or else, Leliana would glare for daring to keep the secret a kiss. Ahh, Leliana will have a blast saying "I told you so".

  
  
  



End file.
